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| Characteristics of Child Tantrums That Must Be Recognized |
Children are a gift from God that we should always love. Although sometimes children make adults angry, but that is not a reason to just scold them right away. Children have their own way of communicating with the people around them. This opposite way arises because they have not been able to equate the way of thinking and behavior with adults.
This difference often causes parents and children to experience misscommunication. When this miscommunication occurs, the child who feels that the meaning of what he said cannot be conveyed and cannot be received properly will then express himself in various ways, ranging from the usual way to the one that seems excessive. One of them is withtantrum behavior .
Tantrums, even though they seem excessive, are what children consider the best way to express themselves. Tantrums themselves are actually part of a child's developmental stage at pre-school age which is characterized by emotional outbursts. Children who experience emotional outbursts during tantrums will generally show the characteristics of a child having a tantrum such as suddenly screaming, crying loudly, rolling around, kicking, hitting, throwing and even convulsing like a person with epilepsy. In fact, they do not hesitate to carry out acts that hurt themselves, such as banging their heads and hitting their bodies.
The characteristics of child tantrums usually occur in the age range of 15 months to 4 years. Tantrums that are carried out by children at this age are temper tantrums. Temper tantrums are certainly different from tantrums experienced by autistic children or the like. Temper tantrums are purely just a form of child self-expression. What children do is also a characteristic of children's tantrums that occur with a vulnerability of about 30 seconds to 2 minutes.
Manipulative Tantrums and Frustrated Tantrums
Even though tantrums are said to be a form of self-expression that ends in emotional outbursts because the wishes cannot be conveyed, there are other things that also cause the appearance of the characteristics of the child's tantrums. This also divides tantrums into 2 types, namely Manipulative Tantrums and Frustrated Tantrums.
1. Manipulative Tantrums
Manipulative tantrums are tantrums that are deliberately created by children so that their wishes are obeyed. For example, a child tells his parents that he wants it to rain. But his parents forbade him. As a result, he who feels that his wish is unfulfilled will carry out the characteristics of a tantrum child with the aim that his wish will be fulfilled.
The thing you have to do when this happens is skip your own child for a moment. Act as if you didn't notice. If you are worried about leaving him alone in the room, wait for your child but try to explain the behavior that you are not paying attention to him.
2. Frustrated Tantrums
This type of tantrum is a tantrum that is carried out by children when they feel hungry, tired, bored, depressed, overcharged, doing things they don't want or sick. For example, when children are invited to shop for clothes at the mall. Usually parents will move from place to place which makes children tired. A child who feels tired and feels that what he is doing is not his world, so he will feel pressured and start to have tantrums.
If you don't want this to happen, you have to know what the child expects. For example, before going say where you are going and what are the benefits for the child. If the child understands, you can bring 1 or 2 small toys that can be played when he follows you shopping. If this is done children will not feel bored and depressed so they can continue to follow you.
Characteristics of Child Tantrums
In order for you to be able to handle when a child has a tantrum, you must first recognize the signs that characterize a child having a tantrum
. So then you have to be careful. Maybe after that the tantrum will arise.
2. The child suddenly becomes mute.
In the midst of his activities, he whines, then suddenly he is dumbfounded. Don't let you feel that the problem belongs to the final child. It could be that after that the child's emotions become more and more.
3. The body stiffens
After the child daydreams, then the next sign is the child's body tensing up. The body is tensed because the child is compensating or holding back emotions that cannot be expressed.
4. Breath hunting
If his emotions can't be expressed and his body has responded, then his breath will hunt. This is in line with the rising emotions that children have.
5. Practically angry.
Children with temper tantrums are indeed vulnerable to stimuli that hit them. If the stimulus he gets is not what he wants, this can result in a tantrum.
6. Rampage
This is the most visible tantrum attitude. The child will scream, kick and even roll on the floor. When this happens it means that the child is no longer able to hold back his emotions.
7. Self-harm
Not only are you angry and screaming, at high levels of tantrum behavior children can even hurt themselves. Regardless of the self-injury behavior he is aware of or not.
8. Excessive emotions
Tantrum children will be really angry when their wishes are not fulfilled. Even though this makes sense, the emotions that arise will seem really excessive and even make him the center of attention due to this attitude.
9. Physical violence
Children who experience tantrums will tend to do physical violence when they are asked to stop or are 'disturbed' in the middle of their tantrums. Physical violence is not only done against oneself, but can also be directed against other people around them. This is carried out subconsciously and has no specific goal.
10. Psychological effects
As said before, children who have tantrums will act out of control and can hurt themselves and those around them. This will have an impact on the psychological condition of the child himself and the children around him. This behavior can make him shunned by friends around him.
Things You Should Do When Your Child Has a Tantrum
So that the child's tantrum behavior doesn't make you upset and even makes the tantrum worse, here are some ways you can do to deal with a child who is having a tantrum.
- Give space for children to express emotions but stay within your reach.
- Give a gentle touch or hug while whispering soothing words and representing his feelings.
- Immediately act by holding his hand if the child does excessive things such as going to hurt himself.
- Give clear rules and try to be consistent with the rules that you have made.
- Don't stop tantrums with physical steps such as hitting or scolding them and don't get carried away by your own emotions.
- Invite children to say when the tantrum is final. Use this potential to find out what the child wants.
- Give options so that he feels his opinion is valued but we are still able to limit it.
Tantrums are children's behavior that is done to express their desires. If you don't want your child to experience excessive tantrums, try to recognize and listen to the child's ideals. If we are able to properly respond to their calls and wishes, the child will definitely not carry out tantrum behavior.